The Illusion of Awareness
In the process of cultivating awareness, we often fall into the illusion of identifying awareness as the self and the self as awareness.
In reality, amidst the myriad thoughts, both internal and external awareness, there is fundamentally no self. Awareness is not me, and I am not awareness. If I tell you that there is originally no self, why then do you identify awareness as the self?
Identifying awareness as the self is a transformation of ego attachment; identifying the self as awareness symbolizes the persistence of ego attachment. Recognizing awareness as the self is yet another rebirth or possession of a false self.
In observation, we feel that “thoughts” are born and perish, while “awareness” is neither born nor perishes, thus mistakenly believing that thoughts are not me but awareness is me.
This is not so! For example, on the ocean’s surface, it seems that one wave disappears while another wave arises; waves appear to be born and perish;
however, in reality, one wave has not disappeared and another has not arisen; waves do not truly arise or perish; birth and death are mere illusions. The previous wave and the subsequent wave are merely in constant transformation,
yet their essence—water—has never changed. Similarly, our thoughts are like this; thoughts seem to be born and perish, but what about their essence—the mind—has ever been born or perished?
Phenomena change while essence remains unchanged. To say that thoughts are born and perish is incorrect; thoughts do not arise nor do they cease; their birth and death are illusions;
to say that awareness does not arise or cease is also incorrect; when awareness arises it can also cease; its non-arising and non-perishing nature is relative. Thoughts and awareness,
are functions of the same mind governed by identical principles of dependent origination. They are subject to the same laws. Thoughts and awareness,
have equal nature; in practice we must treat them equally without elevating one above the other or discarding one for another. If we do otherwise, there will be no rest.
Awareness is a wonderful tool—a tranquil place for rest—a clean inner pure land. You can make good use of your awareness,
using it to eliminate suffering and relying on it for respite, but you must not identify it as me! Identifying awareness as me establishes fundamental life-and-death roots,
erects attachments to a subjectivity, finds a stake to tether infinite existence to, creating a new identity for a false self to continue existing. In this way, when will practitioners truly attain liberation? When will they truly find ease? When will they truly rest?
Observing with an objective eye reveals that both thoughts and awareness are objective—purely appearing as if they undergo birth-and-death changes objectively. There is no “self” between them,
nor outside them; they themselves are also not me—there is fundamentally no self at all. Do not say that thoughts undergo birth-and-death; do not say that awareness does not arise or perish;
do not think that thoughts are not me nor believe that awareness is me—detach from each of these existences one by one. Let these objective phenomena devoid of self remain forever objective; do not be robbed by deluded perceptions!
by – Taiwan Fearless Tathagata Great Perfection Zen Meditation Center